Ah, the ’90s! The last great ride of the major labels, back when they could afford to throw money at any band that sonically resembled Green Day or Nirvana. Sire and Reprise Records were two of the biggest culprits, tossing money at any band that they thought could sell some records. Nine tenths of this type of product went straight to cutout bins across this great country of ours. Many of them still rot there to this day. The Goops’ major label record is one of those.

Picked up for 99 cents, I had only heard one song, a relatively decent cover of “Build Me Up Buttercup” from the old “Mallrats” soundtrack. Sadly, that track is not present on this disc. Unfortunately, twelve songs of woefully mediocre 90’s pop-punk are. Vocalist Eleanor Whitledge tries her best to be punky and full of attitude and spite, but it all just comes across as cheesy and lame. Only one song, “Don’t Wanna Be Like You,” is decent enough to get stuck in your mind.

The band is trying to be fast and punky, but they just sound like everybody else. There doesn’t seem to be one inch of originality in the whole damn band. “You Wish” tries to be like Ani DiFranco or Bikini Kill, very feminist and full of ‘bite,’ but like the entire disc, they just come across as a bunch of wannabes.

Some songs like the overly long “What Did I Do?” just annoy and don’t do anything to sonically please the ears of anybody. The in your face attitude of “Where The Wild Things Roam” seem laughable twenty years later because you can clearly tell this band was trying to do whatever they could to hitch up to the bandwagon that had made Green Day, Rancid, and the Offspring so successful and popular. But alas, it was not to be. This disc completely stiffed and the band disappeared faster than you could say “What happened to the advance money??” And nothing’s been heard from any of these guys in years.

Rating: F

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